Coffee

I started writing a different word for this month and then about 10 days ago I felt very strongly about coffee. So here we are.

A few months ago, I moved to a new city, a new country. While I have visited London a few times before, the learning curve has been immense. I’m learning (a bit late) that living is wildly different from visiting. During the dark days of winter, I was trying to motivate myself to leave the house to find a local yoga-class. While trialling different studios around the area – I discovered a few quaint coffee shops and even met some people. Maybe – I’m secretly a dog who is sniffing coffee on the go? Similarly, when I meet new people here, I ask them if they want to grab a coffee. Somehow, I find the commitment not as big as a meal so easier for both parties – and coffee is strangely very comforting given London’s (abysmal) weather.

While browsing through LinkedIn a while back, I wound up reading up about someone who was doing 1000 coffee catchups with strangers in London. It all felt serendipitous, so I pinged R, who I discovered has been having coffees with strangers since 2019! How fun! We set up a virtual coffee as he was presently based in Berlin. While we were chatting, R made himself a decaf. I’ve always been curious about people who drink decaf – I mean doesn’t one drink coffee for the caffeine? So, what exactly is the point of a decaf? Apparently, it’s for those who love the taste of coffee but cannot handle the caffeine or for those who drink too many coffees so as to not fly off the hook. While I am slightly more awake with my morning coffee, I could very easily be asleep right after having coffee. So, I suppose, no decaf for me?

I’m a flat white girl

I didn’t really think much about these coffees until I heard Esther Perel and Trevor Noah in conversation on the SXSW stage as a podcast. Esther talks about how her most effective small talk happens in a plane and Trevor talks about how weather is the perfect opening between two strangers on a street. Basically, a common point between two strangers must be established so there can be a more to discuss – it is the opening of trust in a relationship. I realised, that is coffee for me in London – an opening to build trust in a place I’m not very familiar with.

Coffee made with love (pun intended), hits different

To think of it, some of the most vulnerable conversations have been over sharing coffee. And many of them with strangers. The fact that they don’t know you intimately but the chanced meeting alongside the discomfort makes being vulnerable possible.

But coffee wasn’t always this for me.

I grew up in a South Indian household that smelt of coffee all-the-while staunchly loving tea. It is only fair considering I’ve always had a bit of a rebellious streak and like to do my own thing much to my parent’s frustration. Then somewhere in my late 20s, very abruptly as I was trying to cut down my sugar intake, I started having black coffee. Eventually after many months of unrequired resistance, I had Ma’s filter coffee – it is one of those that instantly makes your toes tingle. A perfect concoction (of course I have a biased opinion). She’s been making it the same way for over 40 years. I could not replicate it even if she gave me the recipe, I assure you, we have already tried and failed innumerable times.  

My friends for years have just called and come over to have Ma’s coffee. For them it’s the same taste that hits the spot. So, I kind of call it a time capsule. In those moments of sipping coffee – you could be in any of those other moments sipping coffee from before and explore your life through the various years. Imagine, like an OTT platform scroll? Highlights of your life! Flavour in food has that ability, somehow, to make you feel like you’re transported elsewhere. Even if for a brief moment. So, if I’m not responding with my morning coffee at home, this is how I’m spending it.

South Indian filter coffee is known for its strong, bold flavor and rich aroma – so of course I’ve built a penchant for strong, bold coffee. That’s how I realised, so much of food is an acquired taste – you need to build a palette for everything. As a child, your palette is influenced by the flavours of your mother’s kitchen. And these are what you end up considering comfort food. This palette goes through an evolution as you explore more and more flavours and cuisines. As an adult, when you don’t like something, I think it could simply be that you haven’t acquired a taste for it (yet). Somethings are easier to switch to, some are harder, but I would like to think, none are impossible. That being said, I am yet to love a lightly brewed coffee, but hoping to acquire a taste for it in the future

I’ve too many photos of coffee for a normal person?

For something that has a discerning bitter taste, it is amazing how much love coffee has around the world. There are so many third wave coffee shops taking over big and small cities – they have now become a common language between people across ages. Some of these places adapt their menu to have a more local flavour. I remember being in a remote town up near the Himalayas in India and it was amazing to see coffee shops there! I clearly live under a rock. And, espressos were our favourite bonding moment while also studying at Type Paris. Basically, you can find a coffee person who likes the same coffee as you anywhere you ago. That’s a sub-culture like no other. It is fuelled both as a consumer behaviour in response to social media algorithms but also a cross-section of society that is becoming more and more global. It helps me to realise that we as humans are actually a lot more the same than we are different – despite what everyone has been told and might believe.

So, let’s grab a coffee, sometime?